Visualize World Papercuts

One periodically hears of leftists starting a drive to send a 1000 (origami) cranes to Congress or the White House or whoever, which activity will no doubt promote peace, pascifism, faux-pascifism, environmental consciousness, or global healing in ways that are unclear to me. And I say good luck to them; a little harmless eccentricity never hurt anybody and, besides, origami cranes are kind of pretty. Maybe the congressional pages take them home as free Christmas--sorry, Holiday--tree ornaments? Or play some crane version of desktop football with them. But I digress. Because what I was actually wondering about, before I started visualizing Congressmen clustered around a men's room sink having paper crane races, is what message mailing an origami Cthulu to a politician sends? The old "Vote Cthulu" buttons had it that he was the choice for when you're tired of voting for the lesser of two evils. Sooo...that means this "send a 1000 pieces of folded paper" campaign will be by conservatives to Republicans? Gentlemen (and ladies), start your folding.

(Hat tip to Jimmy Akin for the link)

Forgotten Tidbit

I meant to post this with my "Crafty Tidbits" post earlier today, but I forgot.

Isn't it funny how the tiny bits of the past get forgotten, waiting for something to recall them abruptly to mind if it is part of our past or gone utterly until we find a chance reference if it happened before we were born. (Assuming any reference exists.) A couple of months ago I finally got around to reading The Annotated Lolita. I was pleasantly surprised by how good the writing was and I decided to risk the 1990s film; I'd seen the '60s film and just assumed the remake would be worse, as remakes usually are. The '90s Lolita turned out to be as good as the first film, if not somewhat better. It was certainly better in the sets.

Well, when one of the closets in the Haze woman's house was opened and there was one of those bits of unimportant history that gets forgotten: braided coathangers. We had these when I was a kid, and so did my grandmother's house; heck, my grandmother's probably the one who made them. I got such a nostalgic kick out of seeing them, yet I'd totally forgotten their existence until I saw them. I think there were also some knitted discloths hanging in the kitchen, but they may have been potholders. There's also cool '40s clothes to look at, and Jeremy Irons isn't so bad to look at either.

Anyway, I recommend both the Lolita films and the book, which I plan to reread, but in the unlikely event that anyone decides to watch the second film based on my recommendation, maybe I should point out there's full frontal male nudity in one scene. I'm not offended by nudity myself and this isn't gratuitous, as Clare Quilty's penis flapping about as he runs down the hallway serves only to underscore the pathetic state his life has become, but some people are offended by nudity so I thought I'd mention it.

HP and Religious & Cultural Illiteracy

I don't want to go on and on about Harry Potter, but this morning's Corner had a post with links to HP articles. One warns James Dobson and others are picking the wrong fight and should save their fire for genuine attacks on Christianity. (I've said much the same.) Another talks about Christian references in HP and his failure to convince some American evangelicals of their existence. I could quibble with a couple of his not-central-to-the-main-point claims, but why bother? His column is more worth its space than my quibbles would be, and I'd rather remark on a sad observation he makes:

...I think the problem is that so much of the religious
right failed to see the Christianity in the Potter novels because it knows so
little Christianity itself. Yes, there are a few ‘memory verses’ from Saint
Paul, and various evangelical habits like the ‘sinner’s prayer’ and the alter
call. However the gospel stories themselves, the various metaphors and figures
of the Law and the Prophets, and their echoes down through the past two
millennia of Christian literature and art are largely unknown to vast swaths of
American Christendom, including its leaders.

Let's right up front get rid of any notion that what the author is referring to is a phenomenon of evangelical Protestants only. Catholics are every bit as guilty of being ignorant of Christian heritage, and as our Christian heritage forms the bulk of our Western heritage, one could argue secularists are guilty as well.


People used to grow up hearing the Bible, even if they weren't particularly religious, and we also lived in a culture where it was okay to mention religious themes in conversation or artistic expression and so people gained some familiarity almost through their skin. That is gone. We don't know the Bible and we don't know expressions originating there.


For example, John Derbyshire once mentioned using the expression "being expected to make bricks without straw" and having not one of the group of educated Americans he was talking with know the term. As another example, I once referred to Isaac and Ishmael and the lifelong churchgoer I was talking to asked who they were. Kathleen Norris has written about her hymnal changing the term "my Ebenezer" to "my greatest treasure", presumably because people nowadays aren't expected to know what Ebenezer refers to. And lest it seem I'm only picking on other people, back in the nineties I had to ask someone where the phrase "through a glass darkly" came from. I wasn't a Christian, but considering what our Western heritage is, that is no excuse. I didn't know any Ebenezer other than Scrooge, either, and while I assumed it came from the Bible like so many old-fashioned names, I didn't know who the Hezekiah my busdriver was named for was.


And taking my examples away from the Bible itself, I can remember as an older child reading a magazine my mother sometimes got at church (I read everything...well, except the Bible) and seeing an article in which the author mentioned attending Handel's Messiah. I'd never heard of the Messiah, I'm not sure I'd ever heard the term messiah, and I don't think I was aware of any classical music having been informed by Christianity. Yet I was more culturally literate and well-read than any of my classmates. And, at least through the elementary school years, my religious education was the equal of any of theirs. I may have read lots of novels and plays and recognized lots of paintings and sculpture, but there was any number of things I didn't know about the Christianity I'd supposedly been raised in and even when I recognized something came from the Bible or was a religious concept I often couldn't tell you what the reference was or define the concept.

Is any of this important? Well, when as a teenager I was told by various sources that Christianity hates life and regards the natural world as evil, I believed it because I was too ignorant to know otherwise. That mental path--or chute--was already well-greased by years of media depictions of Christians as ignorant hicks who were apt to be bigots as well and I'd already long since rejected Christianity, but that one particular lie which I did not have the knowledge to refute, more than anything else, resulted in my becoming a pagan. So is it important for people to know what Christianity teaches? If you're a Christian parent who doesn't want your teenager to leave Christianity for something else, I think you'd say yes.

And as to Christian history--or the general history of those parts of the world formerly known as Christendom--and the artworks inspired by Christianity, you do not have to be Christian to believe it is important to know about those. Friar Tuck, the Holy Grail, the Nun's Priest, the fleur-de-lys, the Pieta, De Profundis, and Judith Beheading Holofernes belong to all of us.

1 + 1 + 1 = 4

Uncle Pookie had a good story the other day. Seems some stranger started telling him how the singer formerly and currently known as Prince is Satanic. Her "reasoning" was that Prince wrote a song called "Purple Rain", there is no such thing as purple rain, therefore purple rain is unnatural, therefore Prince is Satanic.

Me: "I don't think doves actually cry, either. Did she mention that?"

UP: "Yes."

You just can't make fun of some people.

Crafty Tidbits

Acrylic Yarn and a New Word

A few weeks ago I learned a new word: tawashi. A tawashi is a Japanese scrubbie. (And "scrubbie", for anyone who doesn't use the term, is an English word for something you use to scrub dishes with.) What's interesting to me is that I've read they're typically crocheted with acrylic yarn. I've come across a lot of people online saying you must use cotton yarn for crochet and knit dishcloths, with no reason given, unless you count "because acrylic yarn in the kitchen--eww!" Now, I knew you could use acrylic yarn--my first few did--and that it worked fine. Also, as acrylic yarn dries much faster than cotton, it was arguably more hygienic. (I figure the longer the cloth hangs around damp, the longer nasty things that thrive in damp environments have to grow on it.) But people were so unanimous about not using it I wondered if they knew something about acrylic fiber I didn't. It's good to have some backup to my "it's okay" theory.

So if you have some cheap, scratchy acrylic, make tawashi. Scratchiness is a plus for scrubbing.

You can see one lady's pattern for a tawashi here. I haven't tried the pattern; I'm mostly linking it as an excuse to link the rest of her site, as she's obviously a very skilled crocheter and happens to reside in my home state.


Painting #10 Thread

I mentioned recently that I find size 10 crochet thread a bargain, as I can find it for 29 cents a ball at Goodwill and a ball lasts a long time; even paying retail, which I've never done, it isn't expensive, considering how far it goes. But, no more crocheting than I do, I don't want to clutter up my house with a lot of balls I won't use up. If you need a small amount of size 10 crochet thread in a color you don't have, you can make it yourself, provided you have some cheap acrylic paint on hand and don't mind taking a bit of time. I've tried this several times now, and the only color I had fail was black--I got a nice gray instead. How-to below.

Wind the desired amount of white or ecru thread onto a book or chair back, then loosely tie this skein with a bit of acrylic thread in six places so it won't become tangled during the dyeing. (Five ties will work for skinny skeins.)

Dampen the thread, if desired; I wouldn't bother for a tiny amount of thread, but for a thicker skein it can help get more even coverage.

Squirt acrylic paint in the desired color into a cup or plastic bowl. Thin with water and mix well; you don't want the mixture watery, just a bit more soupy than straight paint (the size of the "bit more" can vary according to the effect you're going for).

Submerge the thread and stir to coat thread with paint. (A bamboo skewer is handy for this.)

Leave to soak a while. I'd say at least half an hour, but how long depends mostly on when it will be convenient for you to do the next step; I've left it all day with no problem. Just leave it somewhere accessible so you can give the thread another stir every time you walk by.

Remove the thread from the paint and hold under running tap water to rinse. When you've rinsed it well, hang to dry.


Bamboo Skewers

Bamboo skewers, while we're near the subject, are a another good crafting bargain. Where I live you can get a pack of fifty, 9"-long bamboo skewers for under a dollar. In addition to poking holes in polymer clay and such like, you can make knitting needles with the skewers (mine gave US size 3); like Thompson's Individual String-ettes, there's a whole host of household uses.


This Blog

I recently began adding labels to past blog entries. I'm far from done and I may never get done because it is a mind-numbingly boring task, but I'm 99% sure I have gotten all of the crafts posts labelled. Not that I'm a good resource or anything, but just in case anyone is interested.

Non-Diva

I saw this post on "hip-hop syndrome" last week, and I wanted to mention it for somewhat tangential reasons. It quotes a City Journal article by Myron Magnet that references Wynton Marsalis.

Wynton Marsalis’s scathing critique of rap understands how hip-hop relates to the larger problem. Leaving aside the lyrics, rap is musically “ignorant,” Marsalis says. “Rhythms have to have a meaning. If the rhythm is corrupt, the music is corrupt and the people become corrupt.” (And, one might add, rap also subverts music’s aim of creating a realm of harmony and beauty.) As for the lyrics, Marsalis says, “I call it ‘ghetto minstrelsy.’..."

I am not well able to comment on the musical opinion Marsalis is quoted on (although I find the idea intriguing), and I refer people to the City Journal article for a discussion of hip-hop syndrome. What I wanted to share was something about Wynton Marsalis, the man.

Eighteen or so years ago, I had the good fortune to hear Mr. Marsalis play. I enjoyed the experience, although I was well aware that my place would have been better filled by a more musical person who could more fully appreciate the obvious artistry. What I best remember is a non-musical thing. I was seated near the stage and could see everything. Mr. Marsalis' piano player was blind and before the performance began, Marsalis led the piano player to his seat himself. And after the performance, Marsalis, the man we were all there to see, gave the piano player his arm once again and led him off the stage. Now, that might seem just common courtesy, but there were other band members, less famous, who could presumably have been made to do it. And there was something thoroughly humble about the manner in which this action was carried out. Mr. Marsalis' name and his face was the one on the tickets and the posters, but he clearly did not consider himself above the un-glamorous task of helping a colleague to his seat. Moreover, it seemed to me by the way he introduced his fellow musicians that he respected them; he really seemed to be more interested in the music than his own ego.

This may seem like a very small thing to relate, but it impressed me at the time. And really, can anyone imagine Barbara Streisand helping her underling to his seat with her very own hands? Or any of quite a lot of other famous people putting aside their own applause for a moment so they can look to someone else?

I may not know much about music, but I do know that I have a lot more respect for any man (or woman) who is more interested in practicing his craft and in being a decent person than in behaving like a prima donna. No one will ever write "Decent Guy" out in sequins and sparkly paint on a tee-shirt, the way they do with "Diva", but we'd all do a lot better to aspire to decency and humbleness than to diva-hood. Or to hip-hop values.

Small HP-related Update

I spent Saturday doing what a great many other people worldwide did, reading Deathly Hallows. I was a satisfied reader; Uncle Pookie seemed a little bit less satisfied than I, but part of that is his ongoing frustration with the Ministry of Magic's failure to come up with better preventive measures--e.g., spells or devices for detecting Imperiused employees. Anyway, I don't want to give any spoilers away for those who haven't yet read it, so I'll just say I liked it and that I was mostly right in the things I guessed would happen. One important thing, on which I'd disagreed with UP, I was wrong about, but to be totally fair I had said that if that thing had happened, it was surely an accident, not deliberate, because doing it deliberately would have been a really bad idea. And I was right about that part of it. (Cryptic enough?)



But I did want to point people to Thomas Hibbs' review, "Harry Potter & the Art of Dying Well" on NRO. Hibbs is a good reviewer, and this review is no exception. I also recommend the Alan Jacobs review that Hibbs links to. I'd read it a couple of years ago on the First Things website, but I read it again and, although it was published when there were only three books in the series, it is well worth reading; there is some really interesting stuff about magic and technology that would be interesting even to people who haven't read or who don't like the Harry Potter series.



And speaking of people who don't like HP, I do not recommend the Ron Charles article Hibbs links as an example of "it's for the masses, therefore it must be bad" type of thinking. (Unless of course you need to see such an example, and in that case I guess it is a pretty good example. I'm only linking it myself because the link in Hibbs' article is broken.) I do not say this because Mr. Charles does not like HP. I do not care whether other people like HP or not, except insofar as I might have more chance of a fun conversation about the books with someone who does. Someone once said that, "in literature, as in love, other people's choices astound us"--in other words, tastes vary; I've seen any number of couples whose reason for being together is completely inexplicable to me, and I'm far too old to think that my tastes in books, anymore than my taste in romantic/marital partner, is or ever will be universal. So the dislike doesn't matter.



But a couple of the reasons for the dislike do. I do not care for the "for the masses=bad" notion, popular though it is among some. I myself often fell prey to that type of pointless sneering when I was young, but I have recognized it as groundless elitism, resting on, insofar as it rests on anything, the faulty idea that something popular can't be good and worthwhile. Of course popular things can be bad, but it is going a long way from that fairly obvious truth to say they're popular because they are bad or that if Billy Bob and Sally Mae like it, it must be crap. And I don't care whether we're talking books, movies, Wal-mart, crafts, or what have you, I do not care for this attitude.



Far more important is one of the other reasons Mr. Charles dislikes HP and it is the reason I bothered to say I do not recommend the piece: Charles refers to "Rowling's little world of good vs. evil". That's a telling phrase if I ever heard one. Hear the contempt? The dismissiveness? People who believe in good and evil, even just to the point of being willing to entertain the idea of a fantasy world in which such things exist, are so-o-o-o medieval! Who knows what sort of backward, incorrect thinking such might get up to? I do believe in the existence of good and evil, and I believe that they are in conflict not only in fictional worlds, both well and poorly written, but in this world, within and without ourselves. And I consider the idea that good and evil do not exist to be a pernicious belief which we entertain to our own destruction. I am completely serious here. Act as if good and evil do not exist or as if they are beneath consideration by intelligent, educated people and you will begin to damage your own self and the wider society. The phrase "rot from within" comes to mind. Much better to dislike the HP books because you think they are badly written or juvenile or boring or even for the reason that they're popular, than because they depict good and evil. That is a hopeless, dead-end sort of thinking that affects far more than your opinion on one series of children's books.

Anyway, I recommend as thought-provoking both the Hibbs review and the Jacobs article. Uncle Pookie also found them interesting.

Last Minute Bookscarves

So-called because they crochet up incredibly fast and there's still time to make yourself (and a friend!) one for marking your place in Deathly Hallows. They could also make a last-minute addition to any book you might be giving someone as a present, or something personal to go with a bookstore giftcard.

Please note, these bookscarves do not look like the house scarves shown in the HP movies, but they use house colors and they do look like scarves. They work up much faster than movie-accurate ones would and there's no tedious weaving in of ends. Bear in mind scarves are not described in the books, so you can imagine Hogwarts students wearing scarves that look any way you like and no one short of Ms. Rowling herself can tell you you're wrong. I think these lengthwise scarves are darn cute, whether they look like the movie scarves or not; that's why I'm posting the pattern, in spite of the fact it is so simple a project I should be embarrassed to presume to give directions.

Supplies:

steel crochet hook, US size 6 (or thereabouts)

small amount of size 10 crochet thread in two colors--I used red and gold for Gryffindor; substitute blue and bronze (or silver) for Ravenclaw, black and yellow for Hufflepuff, green and silver for Slytherin, or whatever colors you want for non-Hogwarts scarves

(optional) tapestry needle

Incredibly Simple Pattern:

Using red (or whatever your MC is), ch until you have approximately 7" of foundation chain (about 60 st).

Dc in fourth ch from hook, and dc across.

Join gold (or other CC) thread, ch 3, and turn.

Dc in fourth ch from hook and dc across.

Join red (or your MC) thread, ch 3, and turn.

Dc in fourth ch from hook and dc across.

At this point, you may want to iron your scarf, spraying lightly with spray starch on each side.

Now those dangly bits of thread where you joined yarn will become part of your fringe. Find a piece of pasteboard or something else that is about one and a half inches in diameter and loosely wind thread around it--about sixteen to twenty wraps of each color will be enough for one bookscarf. Cut one end of the wrap. Now you just add the fringe to the ends of your scarf. You can do it by poking a crochet hook through the scarf and pulling a doubled strand through and looping it around itself the way we often see yarn looped through a punched hole on commercial bookmarks. Or, because this is such tiny stuff, it may be preferable to thread a piece of fringe in a tapestry needle, pull it through the scarf, and tie it on by hand. When all your fringe is on, trim so it's more or less neat-looking, and you're done. Happy bookmarking.

Alternate version, in case you don't have steel hooks or don't like using them: Use the smallest aluminum hook you have--I used a D hook--and ch about 7" same as above, but sc two rows of each color instead of dc-ing one row. Looks just fine and it is still a fast little project.

Note on length: The length of these bookscarves works with the Harry Potter hardcovers, but if you want a bookscarf to go with trade paperback size books, you're gonna want something a bit shorter.

Note on fringe: While typing this, I had an idea to make the fringe-making go faster: take a long piece of thread in tapestry needle and thread through the end of the scarf repeatedly, leaving loose loops of thread below each part where you put it through--clear as mud?--then cut across the end of the loops. When I've actually tried this, I'll update this with whether it worked or not. [Update: Yes, it works, and it does save some time, although not as much as I'd thought it would.]

What I Wore to OotP...

No doubt a lot of fans wore their Hogwarts scarves to see The Order of the Phoenix this past week, but as a fat woman who lives in a #&*%#!*% swamp, I'm not letting a wide, double-layered strip of knitted yarn touch my body in July. But I like dressing up, so I wore a house colors headband.



I knit it a week and a half ago, out of some crochet thread that I had just finished using in another HP-related project. It's basic size 10 crochet thread I found at thrift stores; I don't remember why in the world I bought the red, but when I saw the yellow-gold I snatched it up, because aside from its being a great color in its own right, I knew it would work with the red as Gryffindor. I see crochet thread in thrift stores fairly often, and it is a good bargain because it holds up well (IME thus far, old crochet thread in thrift stores always looks better than the old yarn) and because it lasts for a long time. From my ball of red and gold--29 cents and 25 cents respectively--I've gotten one relatively densely knitted project, one headband, and a passel of crocheted bookmarks. There's still a fair amount of thread on the gold ball (which said 175 yards on the band) and a lot of thread on the larger, red ball.

Anyway, if anyone wants the very simple pattern, here it is.



House Colors Headband


size 10 crochet cotton in house colors (red & gold Gryffindor; blue and bronze or silver Ravenclaw; yellow and black Hufflepuff; green and silver Slytherin)
US size 3 ( 3.125-3.25mm) knitting needles
small crochet hook
tapestry needle for weaving in ends

N. B.: Headband is worked holding two strands of thread together.

Start of headband:

Using crochet hook, ch 50 in MC, then switch to knitting needle.
CO 1 (now 2 st on needle) and K across.
CO 1 (3 st on needle) and K across.
K 1. Kf&b. K across.
Repeat last row until 18 st are on the needle, or until piece is desired width.
K three more rows.

Middle:
(K 3, P until last 3 st, K 3; then on next row
K across) Repeat this until you have 14 rows of st st.

Join in CC, work 2 rows of st st, continuing to have the 3 knit stitches on each edge throughout.
Join in MC, work 4 rows of st st.
Join in CC, work 2 rows of st st.
Join in MC.
Repeat this pattern until you have 4 repeats of the trapped bar design.
Work 14 more rows st st in MC.

End of headband:
K1, K2tog, K across.
Repeat until there's only one st left on needle.
Switch to crochet hook and ch 50. Tie off.

Finishing:
Weave in ends. Iron or press headband to block, if desired; you may also spray lightly with spray starch.

Notes for alteration: Size 10 crochet thread, when doubled, is approximately equivalent to size 3 crochet thread (just a bit smaller); consequently, if you can find appropriate colors in size 3 thread, it will substitute almost exactly. This headband is pretty wide, about two and a half inches, so some people might prefer a more narrow scarf. If making this for children, you'd probably only want three repetitions of the trapped bar design; it would be easy enough to make the crochet chain ties a little longer if three repetions is almost long enough.

Random Thoughts

***

I'd have lots more interesting stories to tell about my youth if I were just a bit stupider.

***

Doc Martens were probably never popular in Japan.

***

Isn't it funny that people who would never condemn the moral choices of any individual (who is, after all, just "doing his own thing", "doing the best he can", etc.) within a nation, thinks nothing whatsoever of condemning an entire nation or civilization.

***

It's odd that Civil War reenactment is so much more popular than American Revolution reenactment. Our gloriously successful, against-the-odds founding vs a very sad time and the latter is more popular for commemorating.

***

The Merchant of Venice is not a play for those uncomfortable with complexity/ambiguity, who can't understand that a victim may also be an aggressor, a pitiable man may also be a bad man.

***

Considering relativism says no philosophy or set of practices is better or more true than another, it's a wonder anyone has ever quite dared to teach it. Or bothered.

***

There's two kinds of people in the world, people who let flies crawl on their children's eyes and people who don't. I figure this is at least as true as any other "two kinds of people" statement.

***

One of my favorite new words: Incumbistan. As in "plump, complacent resident of Incumbistan."

***

Is it just a coincidence that, as young women are less and less likely to have children, the number of young women with pampered dogs is going up?

***

You know how you can wait for the opportunity to make a certain joke, like waiting for someone to mention thunderdomes so you can say, "Oh, can't we just get beyond the thunderdome?" (Yes, I have been watching MST3K.) Well, I'm now waiting for a chilly time around a campfire so I can say to the firebuilder, "Oy, stop being so niggardly with those faggots, there's a nip in the air."

Well, maybe...

...but I strongly deny any belief in the Rotfang conspiracy. Now where did I put my radish earrings?

You scored as Luna Lovegood. You're an extreme introvert and because of this, are also a deep thinker. You ponder things others would never dream of pondering and stand with your beliefs without backing down. You find it more valuable to daydream than to socialize, because there's so much more going on in your head than others'. Most people don't understand it, but you seem to prefer it that way. Luna Lovegood 97% Neville Longbottom 78% Ron Weasley 69% Hermione Granger 63% Albus Dumbledore 59% Severus Snape 59% Bellatrix Lestrange 53% Harry Potter 53% Sirius Black 53% Remus Lupin 38% Lord Voldemort 34% Percy Weasley 34% Oliver Wood 34% Draco Malfoy 34% Harry Potter Character Combatibility Test created with QuizFarm.com

A Book Every American Should Read

The Party of Death: The Democrats, the Media, the Courts, and the Disregard for Human Life, by Ramesh Ponnuru

I put this book in my Amazon.com shopping cart when it was released last spring, but I somehow never got around to purchasing and reading it until a few weeks ago. That was a mistake. This is an important book. It has been out for nearly a year, and there hasn't been nearly the amount of discussion of it there ought to have been. Perhaps some pro-life people figured it had nothing to tell them, but I assume far more people were turned off by the title. The author has explained on NRO and elsewhere that the term "the party of death" did not originate with him and that, no, it does not refer to Democrats.(Although people hearing "the party of death" and assuming it means Democrats is interesting, no?) But this explanation of the term is somewhat undercut by the fact that the subtitle names Democrats and names them first. Surely a better subtitle would have been "Politicians, the Media, the Courts, and the Disregard for Human Life", because, as Ponnuru says, there are members of the party of death in both of America's major political parties and because I think that subtitle might cause many people who would benefit from reading it to dismiss it as just another divisive political diatribe. And that's a shame, because this is a well-reasoned and clearly written book setting forth a secular case--not necessarily the secular case; let's see what other authors have to say--for respecting the right to life. You don't have to be a lawyer or a philosopher or a politics groupie to understand this book; any average high school student should be able to read it and understand the arguments, and the chapters aren't so long that they'll tax many people's attention span. Read it and think about it.

And another thing...

While we're on the subjects of the British and of people using language funny--well, sort of, almost on those topics--some days back I saw a news story about a disabled British man whose Christian hospice had, in some unspecified way, facilitated his hiring a prostitute so that he wouldn't have to die a virgin. Someone speaking on behalf of the hospice said that they didn't make moral judgements for their patients. That is just plain fatuousness. When we refuse to help someone carry out an action that we believe to be immoral we are not making a moral decision for that person, we are making a moral decision for ourselves.

Who says the British are the masters of understatement?

An AP story, dated yesterday but which I only read today, says that a Texas man named Adrian Estrada has been sentenced to death for murdering a seventeen year-old young woman and her fetus. Estrada choked and stabbed the young woman who was pregnant with his child thirteen times.

"Estrada's attorney, Suzanne Kramer, had argued that her client made bad
decisions."

As a way to describe murder, "bad decision" is accurate, as far as it goes, but it just doesn't go far enough. There are bad decisions and there are bad decisions. A man who decides not to lock his car door because he's "just going to be in the convenience store for a few minutes" has made a bad decision. The man who decides to take advantage of that unlocked door by stealing the car has also made a bad decision. Yet only one of these bad decisions deprives someone of his rightful property and can result in jail time; Christians might also note that only one of those bad decisions requires repentance. And I think all of us, including the most ardent car-lovers and property rights upholders, would agree that deciding to attack and murder a pregnant woman is a much worse bad decision than deciding to steal a car. Even people who wouldn't want the fetus listed as one of Estrada's victims would generally agree that murder is a very bad decision indeed.

"It that enough to execute him? Is that enough to kill him?" she asked the jury.

Apparently Texas law and that jury think so.


A question I'm probably not supposed to ask: I wonder if these murderous attacks on pregnant women have become more frequent since the advent of the birth control pill and legalized abortion.

Recommending Liberty!

I just wanted to recommend a DVD series that Uncle Pookie and I finished watching this weekend: Liberty! The American Revolution. This six-episode, PBS documentary is from 2004, but it was new to us. No history documentary is perfect or can satisfy everyone, but I think this one is excellent. Liberty! is especially good in showing that American opinions were varied before, during, and after the war and reminding us that the outcome of the conflict was by no means known by the rebels or guaranteed to be successful (an obvious fact that we nevertheless sometimes forget, not only about this war but about others in history.) There is a lot of use of extracts from contemporary documents, which I loved. The ending of the war in episode 5 (ep.6 carries us through the creation of the Constitution) seemed rather abrupt, but other than that small thing I can't think of anything I disliked about this series. I heartily recommend this to everyone; families with junior high or high school students studying American history could get a lot of good from it--enjoyment, help with schoolwork, and food for conversation.* It would almost be worth watching just for the poignant rendition of "Johnny Has Gone for a Soldier", a song popular at the time of the Revolution, that ends each episode.

* FWIW, my top recommended question for discussion is, "If you were an American colonial before the war, which side would you have been on?" I have been a patriotic American and a believer in the Revolution since I was a little girl, and yet I have never been able to answer that question with 100% certainty for myself ever since my high school teacher suggested it one day during class. But if you find this an easy question there's lots of other things to discuss in this series.

Idiocracy

However much we might hate talk about "all the wrong people having children" and the egregious idea that lies behind it, try to tell me some of us didn't squirm a little at the wonderful bit of satire at the beginning of this film that contrasts the nice, intelligent, middle-class couple's approach to procreation with that of the gauche, lower-class family.

Beyond that beginning, Idiocracy is less good, although still entertaining in a Fox kind of way--even if Fox did refuse to support the film after it'd been made. Ignore the logic holes and enjoy. And who knows, maybe there will be a few babies born to intelligent, educated couples as a result of watching it. Our society needs more babies.

The Men of Firefly

Jayne is the kind of man you have an affair with if you happen to have an affair (which of course you shouldn't) while you're ovulating. Wash and Simon are the kind of men you marry. The captain is the kind of man you hold a secret, lifelong attraction for; he might or might not marry. Discuss.

Six Weird Things About Me

Noone has tagged me with this meme, but here they are anyway:


# I take pride--not much, but some--in the fact I've never let my household run out of toilet paper. (I grew up in a household where the lady of the house often let us run out of staples, including toilet paper.)

# As a child, riding past fields on Christmas Day, it seemed sad to me that the cows didn't know it was a special day.

# My earliest verifiable memory took place on the Halloween a few days before my first birthday. (I have a non-verifiable memory that would have had to take place months beforehand.)

# I will spend longer dithering over whether to spend two dollars on a non-necessity than my husband does over spending two hundred dollars on a non-necessity.

# Because humans need analogies and metaphors and because I am who I am, I tend to think of God as the Great Novelist.

# I'm a fan of refrigerator stew. (Definition below, for the uninitiated.)


And that's my six things. Anyone who reads this is encouraged to post theirs on their blog or in the comment box.

___________________
Refrigerator stew is a soup made in the following way: Keep a container in the freezer and every time you have a too-small-to-save amount of leftover vegetables (non-cruciferous veg only) or legumes you put it in the container. When the container is full or nearly so, dump the contents into a large pot, add broth or vegetable juice and some meat, throw in some herbs for extra flavor, and simmer the whole thing until done. If I have a leftover serving of rice or pasta in the refrigerator, I might add that to the soup pot too. Results are usually good, sometimes very good. Now I think of it, there's no reason you couldn't start with a roux, although I don't.

Words That Sound Like Other Words

Yesterday on Craftster I saw a thread in which a couple of people seemed to have some discomfort with the term "fagot/faggot stitch", a knitting stitch pattern which I must confess I'd never heard of, although I've long known the similar sewing term--and, for that matter, the original stick term and its use in shortened form to refer to cigarettes in England, as well as the pejorative term these posters wanted to avoid seeming to say. Laudable as their desire not to give offense may be, I have a comment.




Item: My mother has told me how, in her youth, her teenage brother used to upset their preschooler nephew mightily by accusing the nephew of "peering out the window". The outraged child would be driven nearly to tears as the older boy asserted that he'd "seen him do it".

Item: Supposedly there was a politician back in the '30s who "attacked" his opponent by telling voters that the opponent's sister was a known thespian and that the opponent and his wife had practiced pre-marital celibacy. Ignorant voters drew the (intended) conclusion that the opponent and his family were immoral and supported the accuser.



People who get offended by words that happen to sound like other, offensive words are like my preschool cousin and those voters: they are betraying their ignorance by getting upset over inoffensive words they don't understand. Actually, many of them are even worse off than my little cousin and the uneducated voters, because my uncle was deliberately trying to annoy my cousin and the politician was deliberately trying to mislead the voters. A city councilman or teacher who uses the word "niggardly" to describe something that is niggardly is not trying to mislead or offend anyone. A person who uses the word "faggot" to describe a bundle of sticks, "fagoting" to refer to a certain decorative sewing technique, or "fagot stitch" to refer to a particular knit stitch pattern is not intending to mislead or offend anyone. To insist on being offended in these cases where there is no offense and no intent to cause offense is either to show that you are ignorant or to show that you are determined to be offended even when you know there's nothing to be offended about. Better vocabulary instruction in the schools could help with the former, but I don't know if there's anything that can help the latter.

Cats Are Like Clerihews and Other Random Thoughts

***

Someone once said that the odd thing about clerihews is that the very best of them aren't much distant from the worst of them. Cats are like that.

***

How old do you have to be before you stop being a "product of conception"? I mean, I'm no longer an embryo, anymore than I'm a teenager, but aren't I still a product of conception?

***

Do you think Scandinavians in the 870s ever crooned along to that great old song, "Who's Making Love to Your Old Lady, While You're Out Pillaging Saxons?"

***

Pointless products: half-slips for mini-skirts. Really mini skirts. I think if you're wearing a skirt that barely covers your butt you've already decided you don't care if strangers can see what we euphemistically, and in this case ironically, refer to as your "privates".

***

I really wish people would once again start using the word bitch to refer to female dogs. I have no quarrel with the other uses of the word, I just miss the original use.

***

A relatively new (about 2 yo) pet peeve in my list of peeves: young girls referring to clothes that sit at the natural waist as "high-waisted". How can something possibly be high-waisted when it sits at the waist?

***

If you kept trying to "express yourself" and everything you made was ugly, wouldn't you think it's time to try expressing something else?

***

Spotted at a Best Buy: A longish job posting taped to the door that moves to the side as you approach. Apparently they're recruiting non-myopic speed readers.

***

I recently heard that it's wrong to "put limits on people". Guess I'll get started protesting those anti-murder and anti-cannabalism laws now. I feel really limited by those animal cruelty laws too. And don't even get me started on that oppressive stuff about leaving vengeance to the Lord.

***

Two Memes

Why? Because I am endlessly fascinating.
Alternate answer: My ego demands it.
Real answer: I'm bored (because I'm boring--yes, yes, I know.)


One-Word Answer Meme

I found this meme on Lilith Parker's blog. The rules are one-word answers and no explanations.

1. Yourself: off-beat
2. Your significant other: husband
3. Your hair: long
4. Your mother: unbalanced
5. Your father: uninvolved
6. Your favorite item: paper
7. Your dream last night: bizarre
8. Your favorite drink: tea
9. Your dream car: dependable
10. The room you are in: computer
11. Your ex: forgettable
12. Your fear: litigiousness
13. What you want to be in 10 years? healthy
14. Who you hung out with last night? husband
15. What you're not? extroverted
16. Muffins: homemade
17. One of your wish list items: audiobook
18. Time: nighttime
19. The last thing you did: breathed
20. What you are wearing: clothes
21. Your favorite weather: cool
22. Your favorite book: un-determinable
23. The last thing you ate: soup
24. Your life: wasted
25. Your mood: glum
26. Your best friend: husband
27. What are you thinking about right now? waste
28. Your car: reliable
29. What are you doing at the moment? shirking
30. Your summer: humid
31. Your relationship status: contented
32. What is on your TV? nothing
33. What is the weather like? rainy
34. When is the last time you laughed? today



Forty-two Questions Meme

1. FIRST NAME? Suzanne.
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? No.
3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? Don't remember, but tears came into my eyes during last Sunday's mass; they often do during mass.
4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It's okay.
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCHMEAT? Roast beef.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? If I could get to know me, yeah...probably.
7. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? [looking around furtively] Who wants to know?
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes and no; I have part of one.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? No. Well, maybe if my or my husband's life depended on it.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Old-fashioned oatmeal for hot cereal, raisin bran for cold.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Not always. I'm not proud of it.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Physically, I'm a pack mule.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? Chocolate. Haagen-Daz for a preference, but I don't say no to store brands.
14. SHOE SIZE? US women's 10.
15. RED OR PINK? Red!
16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I am not as icy cold as I'm told I sometimes appear to others.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? I don't miss anyone; it would be nice to see my sister more often.
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS, SHIRT AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I refuse to answer this question on grounds it would make me sound like a slob.
19. LAST THING YOU ATE? Soup.
20. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? I was listening to EWTN audio, but I turned it off, so now nothing except ambient noises.
21. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Dark purple; what do they call that crayon--Royal Purple or Deep Violet?
22. FAVORITE SMELL? My husband. But coffee is a pretty good smell too.
23. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My sister.
24. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? Hmm, people generally? Something about their manner, I guess; I think I'm quicker to notice things that repulse me. But if it is men particularly and it's attracted, instead of attracted, then it is whether they are tall and have a big build or not.
25. FAVORITE DRINK? Tea.
26. FAVORITE SPORT? I don't care for team sports, either as a viewer or a participant. I don't watch sports, period.
27. EYE COLOR? Green.
28. HAT SIZE? I don't know, but I have a big ol' head.
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Not now, but I have done.
30. FAVORITE FOOD? Depends on my mood. I love lots of different foods. I feel best--i.e. most energy, fewest mood swings--when I eat meat or eggs with non-starchy vegetables.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings, but they don't have to be syrupy and bittersweet is fine. I don't watch slasher movies at all, but I am not averse to "psychological" scary.
32. SUMMER OR WINTER? I live in a *!%&#!% swamp, what do you think?
33. HUGS OR KISSES? Hugs.
34. FAVORITE DESSERT? Whatever it is, it involves chocolate--possibly more than one form of chocolate and one of those forms preferably dark. It's hard to beat a warm walnut brownie with a scoop of ice cream, and hot chocolate sauce. I love cheesecake, even when it doesn't have chocolate and I must note it is the only dessert that remains delicious even when it is sugarless.
35. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? P. D. James' Original Sin and Peggy Noonan's When Character Was King.
36. WHAT’S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? I use a trackball.
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH LAST NIGHT ON TV? Nothing.
38. FAVORITE SOUNDS? It's hard to beat my husband's heart.
39. ROLLING STONE OR BEATLES? Who cares? Really, I don't have a preference.
40. THE FURTHEST YOU’VE BEEN FROM HOME? A town just across the Mexican border.
41. WHAT’S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? I am very good at biting back words, although I'm not so sure that is a natural talent so much as decades of practice. And some people might justifiably point out I'm not so good at it as would benefit me.
42. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Mississippi.

My Simple Knitted Cotton Kerchief

I've crocheted kerchiefs in the past, but I've not been entirely happy with them. I think a filet crochet (which I've never yet tried) kerchief has potential, but in the meantime I prefer the knitted one that I finished a few days ago to the crocheted ones.

Although when you get right down to it, I should probably just have fabric ones; I don't because I have trouble finding scarves I love that are the right size, because I haven't actually undertaken to sew any yet for no reason I can fathom, and because making something relatively practical out of all that yarn keeps seeming like a good idea.

Anyhoo, this knitted one is nice enough. It is easy to make, drapy, lightweight, and doesn't look too hokey (a highly subjective judgement, obviously).


Supplies:
Aunt Lydia's Fashion Crochet Thread (a size 3 cotton thread);
size 6 knitting needles (personally, I'd go a size bigger before I'd go a size smaller);
crochet hook or hooks (I used an E and an F, I think)


Cast on two (2) stitches.

Rows 1-2: Knit across.

Row 3-4: Knit across, increasing one stitch on each row by knitting into front and back.

Row 5: Knit one, yarn over, knit across.

Repeat Row 5 until kerchief is the size you want. Bind off, but do not cut yarn at the end.

Take crochet hook and chain about 50--more or less depending on size needed. Turn and in second ch from hook, slip stitch across chain. When you get to the body of the scarf, single crochet across the top of the kerchief. When you get to the other end, ch 50. Turn and begin slip stitching in second chain from hook. When you get back to the scarf, slip stitch and bind off. (Where the two crochet hooks come into it, is that you, like I, may prefer to use a smaller size hook on the ties and switch to one a size larger hook for the finishing on the body of the kerchief; this makes the ties a bit tighter-looking.)

OR, if you'd like a more finished edge, you could at that point single crochet down the side of the kerchief, do an extra couple of single crochets at the point, sc up the other side, and ss shut when you get back to the first tie.

A Mini-Update

I mentioned not quite two months ago that I'd just learned to knit. Well, after doing a number of practice swatches that I immediately frogstitched, I now have completed three dishcloths (with increasing and decreasing--yay!), a pair of Mary Jane slippers from directions on Craftster, and a "non-rolling boyfriend scarf" that is about as long as I am. Okay, so the first dishcloth was really lopsided--I was trying to loosen my tension as Elizabeth Zimmerman recommends in the Knitting Without Tears I'd skimmed and I guess I started to have success with that on the decrease side--and the next two aren't perfect. And I still haven't sewn the buttons on the Mary Janes, so it's not really honest to say they're completed, and I can point to several imperfections in my scarf.

But so what about those imperfections? For me it's not about the finished objects, it's about the pleasure. Knitting is pleasurable. Much more so than crochet. For some reason I can't explain, I find the motion of knitting--and even purling--to be more pleasurable than the motion made in crocheting; now when I crochet I like it far less because I'm comparing it to knitting. I also like that I can really watch TV when knitting; there's much less looking down than there is with crocheting. The main thing I want from either of these handicrafts is something to occupy my hands with while I watch TV (actually DVDs, as I almost never watch TV anymore), and knitting does the job better than crocheting--or for that matter, better than handsewing, which was the previous thing I'd tried.

I'll never be a really accomplished knitter--or crocheter--because, well, my main goal is just to have something to do while I watch TV, nothing more. But I am going to keep up the knitting at some level because I like it. And because I don't plan to stop watching DVDs anytime soon.


Speaking of DVDs, I recently got around to watching Firefly and Serenity. Finally. I'd sort of intended to try it when it aired--UP actually caught an episode or two--and since then I've seen a number of eye-catching references to it or crafts made from it, John Derbyshire commented favorably on it, and there was this:

Your Ultimate Sci-Fi Profile II: which sci-fi crew would
you best fit in?
You scored as Serenity (Firefly).You like to live
your own way and don’t enjoy when anyone but a friend tries to tell you should
do different. Now if only the Reavers would quit trying to skin you. [from
QuizFarm.com]

I liked Firefly a lot and am sorry it didn't last longer; I would have liked to see how the characters' stories developed. The ship's crew were likeable and interesting and the interactions were fun to watch, but I think the world itself was what I liked best. The Asian-Western fusion felt right for the future, I liked a future of multiple frontier worlds rather than a lot of highly polished ones, and it was all refreshingly different from other science fiction shows that have been on TV.

The movie, Serenity, wasn't as good as the TV show, but I'm glad they got to do it.

For both the TV show and the movie, I'm glad Ron Glass was getting work; I liked him on Barney Miller. (Here's how warped I was as a little girl: he was a close second to the character I liked best, the over-educated, intellectual guy.) As for younger men, Jayne was attractive in a purely physical way and a fun character. The captain was attractive; I think that's not just the character as written, but the actor, because he had a certain masculine charisma even when he was playing a thoroughly disgusting villain on the final season of Buffy. And, although I shouldn't admit it, I liked the one-shot character Jubal Early. He was clearly warped in the kind of way that leads to very bad things, but, God help me, I liked him. Jubal Early is the kind of man that some writer once said you can use to gauge the level of the society by--primitive societies kill men like that, societies in the second stage make use of men like that as torturers and executioners, third stage or advanced societies try to rehabilitate them, and really advanced fourth stage societies kill them.

Anyway, although there are some problems with the show--most notably the Alliance not being depicted realistically enough--it was highly enjoyable and I am giving it the official Auntie Suzanne Seal of Approval. Okay, I'm actually just recommending it, but that sounded more impressive, didn't it?


As long as I'm at it, I'll recommend a movie I meant to recommend when I watched it a two or three months ago: Tristan and Isolde (or is that Tristan + Isolde, like Baz Luhrman's Romeo + Juliet?) I have never particularly cared for the Tristan and Isolde story, and I dislike movies and books about adulterers as a rule. But I saw Card's review when this was in the theaters in--what?--January, and was interested enough to get the DVD from Netflix. I still don't approve of adultery, but this movie shows their adulterous relationship causing problems and it does what it can to make the temptation understandable. What I most liked was that they made Isolde's husband likeable. How easy it would have been for the moviemakers to make him a brute who deserved to be cheated on, all to make some point about how adultery is okay, because "the heart wants what it wants" or some such nonsense. Instead we get a more complicated and better story. Good for them. We are also given some really good acting and some great costumes and scenery. This movie deserves to have more of an audience than it had in its theater run. Rent it.


Oh, and we--it's probably congenital stupidity or something--acquired a new cat a while back. Maybe I'll do a "Meet Mr. Foofy, the Cat Who Lives With Us" post later.

We lead decidedly uneventful lives--a blessing really, when you consider that most events worth relating are disasters of one kind or another and adventure is just another name for trouble--so that's really about it.

Reduced Sugar Gingerbread Muffins

If you've ever had gingerbread and wondered what the attraction is, you need to find a copy of Laurie Colwin's Home Cooking (which I've recommended before on this blog) and check out the chapter called "How to Make Gingerbread". The Gingerbread Cake in there is delicious. It tastes great plain, dusted with powdered sugar, served with a little applesauce or whipped cream, or--believe it or not--iced with the chocolate icing recipe the author includes. It tastes great warm or cold. It is also easy to make and fills the house with a smell that is better than any commercial air freshener or, for that matter, any other baking cake I know.

This recipe is adapted from that and I freely admit it is not as good as the original. But it cuts the sugar some, it makes a smaller amount--always good for one or two person households--and muffins are a bit easier to carry along for breakfast on the go than cake. (Yeah, I'm re-e-a-ally health conscious.) And it smells just as good baking.


Reduced Sugar Gingerbread Muffins

4 Tbsp (1/2 stick) butter or margarine, softened
1/4 Cup Splenda in the bag
1/4 Cup Steen's Cane Syrup
1 egg
3/4 Cup plain flour
1.5 tsp baking powder
pinch salt
1/8 Cup dry milk
1 scant Tbsp ground ginger
1/2 slightly rounded tsp ground cinnamon
dash ground cloves
dash ground allspice
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 Cup water

Heat oven to 375 degrees. Butter a 6-muffin muffin tin or spray with non-stick spray. Cream butter and Splenda together. Beat in cane syrup and egg. Add dry ingredients and mix. Stir in vanilla and water. Pour batter into muffin tin and bake until a knife or toothpick comes out clean--about 20 minutes.

Notes: I think Steen's Cane Syrup is a regional brand, so substitute some other cane syrup or molasses if it's not available to you. You can regard the vanilla as optional; I've accidentally left it out and it was fine, due no doubt to my using so much ginger.

Also, if you like try this and like it--or even if you don't--buy a copy of Home Cooking. It's available on Amazon and its writing has given me much pleasure.

Making a Snood, a Lackadaisical Quest

(What is a snood, you ask?)

I posted previously about sewing a snood from mesh fabric and doublefold bias tape: One Way to Make a Snood

As I haven't found additional mesh fabric since then, I figured I was going to have to crochet my own. (Well, either that or order from the no doubt excellent Lady MacSnood whose definition is linked above.) Online searches this summer revealed a scarcity of snood patterns. Of those, half were ballet-type bun covers, a couple made weird little purses that sat at the nape of the neck and strapped over the top of the head, and the few that were left either weren't appealing or didn't have photos. One or two patterns were for knitting, which I hadn't learned to do. I also found some directions for solid fabric snoods, which, while they might have history and might serve a purpose for some women, weren't what I was looking for or even what I think of when I think snood. But despite this lack of suitable patterns, I was not energetic enough to make my own pattern.

Then in The Golden Hands Complete Book of Knitting and Crochet (ISBN 0394485696), I found a pattern for a simple crocheted snood. I made it and, as I suspected, it was only a bun-cover, but I jotted down adaptations to make the pattern a full-size snood. By the time I'd bought new size 3 cotton thread and dyed it to the colors I wanted, I was out of the mood for snood-making, but recently in a spirit of winding things up for the year--and maybe getting a purple snood for Advent--I got out my yarn and pattern and went for it. Or at least I went for it after I spent ten to fifteen minutes deciphering my jottings; apparently I am past the age when a couple of cryptic notes are all I need to recall something entirely to my mind. A couple of versions later, I can provide a basic pattern to anyone who's interested and is willing to read poorly written instructions.

I am including it here, although it is an adaptation, because 1.) the book it is adapted from is out of print; 2.) my understanding is that stitch patterns, nearly all of them being traditional, can't be copyrighted; 3.) my adaptation is a different size from the original, is arguably a different item (full-size snood v bun cover), uses different yarn, uses a different size hook, and is rewritten in my own words, although admittedly there's not a lot of ways to reword a stitch pattern. If you want to see the original bun-cover directions, find a secondhand copy of the book.


Honeycomb Mesh Stitch Pattern

Make a chain divisible by 4, plus 11. (Or so the original stitch pattern says and I've done, but you might want to try plus ten instead.)

First row: Work 1 dc into tenth ch from hook, *ch 4, skip 3 ch, 1 dc into next ch, rep from * until end. Ch 8 and turn.

Second row: Work 1 dc into first ch 4 space in the previous row, * ch 4, 1 dc into next ch 4 sp, rep from * until end of row. Ch 8 and turn.


Honeycomb Mesh Snood

Supplies for the basic snood: about 1/2 to 2/3 ball of Aunt Lydia's Fashion Crochet Thread (a size 3 thread); E hook; a length of either round elastic cord or narrow ribbon long enough to tie around your head (nape to top, not crown)

Ch 47.

Work the honeycomb mesh stitch pattern (there will be ten spaces in the first row), but increase one space at beginning of each row by working one extra dc and ch 4 into the first sp. Do this until you have a row with 18 sp, then work 4 rows without shaping; this will give you a total of five rows that have 18 sp. Then begin decreasing one space each row, by simply skipping over the first space in each row. Keep dec until you have a row with only 10 sp in it. Do not turn. Take your hand and smooth it out--it makes a shape like a Chinese lantern while flat--before proceeding.

Finishing: You will begin working your edging down the side right by where you made your last dc. * 2 sc into next sp, 1 sc into next sp, rep from *all down that side and around to wheere you started. (If when you get down to where you left a tail of yarn from the foundation ch, you pick it up and work it together with the working yarn, you won't have to weave it in later.) Join with ss to first sc. (At this point, you may want to try it on to make sure it will fit before proceeding.) Work two rounds of sc, one sc per st. Fasten off. Weave in tail.

At this point, you can thread elastic cord through the edging, or you can thread a ribbon through and tie your snood on; either works, although the round elastic cord is a bit more difficult to thread through, due to its shape and not wanting it to show. Alternatively, you could tuck the edging inside some doublefold bias tape or folded over velvet or ribbon and sew it down, leaving a small opening, then run some 1/4 or 1/8 inch elastic through the tube, and secure the ends; I haven't actually tried this yet, but there's no reason why it wouldn't work. You may want a few bobby pins to secure the snood while wearing, even if you use elastic.

Ideas for Embellishments. I like simple styles, but some possibilities for fancifying the basic mesh snood might include: adding some beads to your crochet; working with two differently colored threads held together (two strands of size 10 thread held together can substitute for size 3 thread, although it's actually a bit smaller); possibly holding a metallic sewing thread with the regular crochet thread; or stitching a crochet motif, felt shapes, or tiny artificial rosebuds to the mesh. If you'd like to use a wider, more decorative ribbon in the edge of your snood, you could try substituting a row of double crochet for one row of the sc to give you more space.

Notes on size: I have a big head and waist-length hair and this size snood just fits me; adding one or two rows at the maximum space-count in the middle wouldn't hurt me, but might be a little loose for people with average-size heads. My first version--foundation ch of 55, with 12 sp on the first row, and 27 total rows with 11 of them at the maximum space-count of 20 sp--was too big when I simply slipped it on, but when I added a ribbon, it gathered the excess to my head and fits nicely. The smaller size snood doesn't drape as I would like, but the larger one does; however, the smaller size might well drape properly on someone with a smaller head and less hair. The larger version took me about 3/4 of a ball of thread.


The "quest", lackadaisical though it is, goes on.

Although this snood pattern works and I like the simple look of the honeycomb mesh, I'm not 100 percent satisfied with it. I have about four ideas about different ways to get what I want, but I'm not keen to work on any of them. What I'll probably end up doing is just crocheting a flat, openwork fabric that is roundish and gathering it into a fabric band, as I did with the snood I made from purchased mesh fabric.

I think I've discovered a universal law...

I am, for some reason, really amused by the Helsinki Complaints Choir, in which the complaints of Helsinki residents are set to choral music. There is also a knock-off of the idea done by singers in Birmingham, England. The universal law I think I've found is this: Complaining sounds a lot better when you don't understand the language.


Here's links to a few other interesting things I've read online recently:


"Let's Stop Stereotyping Evangelicals" -- A short article urging exactly what the title says. The money quote:

"Even the Moral Majority in its most belligerent form amounted to nothing more terrifying than churchgoers flocking peacefully to the polls on Election Day."


"How to Cheat at Art" -- The text of an illustrated speech on art "cheats" such as the camera obscura; it even talks about some contemporary artists thinking that not leaving in preliminary, "feeling your way" lines is a cheat. We can't see the slides that would have accompanied this speech and the speech hasn't been copy-edited quite so well as it might have been, but it has some interesting tidbits.

"Scientists claim computer has solved mystery of Shakespeare's 'missing play'" -- Newspaper article I read a month ago that I still had in my temporary folder. Two professors claim their computer analysis shows conclusively that Arden of Faversham was written by Shakespeare. I have to confess I had never heard of this play, but its Wikipedia entry sounds interesting enough I might check it out someday.


Something About Underwear in an Article About Something Else --Here's the quote:

"Mine is only the second generation of males in my family to wear underpants. I wear them, and my Dad wore them. Neither of my grandfathers did, though. They wore shirts with long tails. Before putting on their pants, they tucked the shirt tails round underneath to establish the desideratum — apparently universal in pants-wearing cultures — of having something between pants and fundament."

I'd just been thinking about something along those lines when I read this. I think I'm the third generation of women in my family to wear both underpants and bra. According to my mother, when she was a small child (she was born during WWII) country women commonly did not wear bras and some of the very old women did not wear underpants. On the underpants question, bear in mind this was not just a poor part of the country, but a very humid climate; not having an additional layer underneath your dress and slip--or even just under a dress and apron--had some advantages, even if it wasn't the fashion to go without in other parts of the country.

As for bras, though, it's amazing to think how recent the modern bra is in human history. Stays may have provided some support in some eras, but Guinevere, Isolde, and Eleanor of Aquitaine never had any "cross your heart", "lift and separate" type support, and whatever Anne Boleyn may have done as a maid, she didn't "do it in her Maidenform bra". History is full of, if you'll pardon the expression, bouncing boobies--not that any of us ever think about that when reading Jane Austen.

And all of this means--I don't know really. I just found it interesting to think how recently my family, among other families, have taken to underwear. Something most of us regard as a necessity can be a relatively recent addition to people's lives. I was surprised the first time I saw a medieval illustration of people warming themselves near a fire, tunics hitched up and genitals showing, but it was apparently a not uncommon sight then, just as women nursing babies was a common sight before we decided that bottlefeeding was more "scientific" and hygienic than breastfeeding. Anyway, like I said, I'm not going anywhere with this, I'm just musing out loud. Also, I thought that shirt-wrapping thing was kind of cool, although it sounds rather awkward.

Veteran's Day

St. Crispin's Day was October 25, but Veteran's Day (Remembrance Day to Canadians and British folk) is also a good day to listen to this speech. Another memorable recitation of this occurs in the movie Renaissance Man.

And for a reminder of what some of our veterans have endured for us, see this testimony from a POW. Page down and look for the program dated 05/29/06, that interviews Captain Guy Gruters.

One of my favorite characters in the Gospels is the Roman soldier (see Matthew 8:5-13) whose words we echo in every mass, "Lord, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and I shall be healed." Jesus, who had not disdained to visit the man's house where his servant was dying, was amazed at the man's faith. Any Christians who may be inclined to disdain our military personnel should remind themselves of the Roman centurion whose faith impressed Jesus. We should all pray to have his ability to recognize Jesus; and it's an excellent day to add our soldiers, sailors, and airmen to our prayers, if they aren't there already.

The Face and Stamps

The Face: Jesus in Art

If you like visual art, you'll probably enjoy this DVD even if you aren't a Christian, but if you are a Christian with an interest in art, this will be doubly interesting to you. It is an overview of the way Jesus has been depicted from the early catacomb days to twentieth century depictions, such as Warner Sallman's famous depiction. The Face was originally a PBS program and no one expects a TV program to be extremely thorough, but as an overview, I think it's good. The average viewer may have seen many of the works, but seeing so many organized together is informative and there are apt to be a few new things--for example, how many of us have seen Latin American triple-faced Jesuses?

For me, the most wonderful was a painting I've probably seen a picture of before (I used to enjoy spending lots of time looking at art books) but which, if I had, I'd never really noticed before, namely Chagall's White Crucifixion. It is amazing. Just having The Face bring this painting to my notice made it worth viewing for me. I'd like to think The Face could help do more. I long to see more Christians painting Jesus and other figures and themes from Judeo-Christian tradition, and who knows, maybe seeing this DVD could spark an interest in making religious art in the heart of an artistic young person. I can hope.

About the only problem I had--and it is a very minor one--was that in the final segment they called Hunt's The Light of the World the depiction of Jesus most influential on, if I do not misremember the wording, twentieth century art. I am not sure that is true. It certainly hasn't been reprinted as often as the Sallman's picture and I don't think the people are familiar with it, the way they are, say, DaVinci's Last Supper; I've look at lots of artbooks in my lifetime, and I don't think I'd ever seen it until four or five years ago I've look at lots of artbooks. Something can be influential without the average AuntieSuzanne on the street having heard of it, but I'd like them to have given some support for their statement and they didn't. Anyway, this is still well worth a spot in your Netflix queue.

FWIW, my favorite portrait of Jesus is Rembrandt's Head of Christ, which you can see here or here.


Holiday Mail

Speaking of art reminds me of something I just found out: the US Postal Service will be releasing a Madonna and Child stamp this year, and, wonder of wonders, it actually says Christmas across the top. (You can see all of this year's choices here.) If you remember, last year there were some complaints about the USPS releasing no Madonna and Child stamp as in years past, or any religious Christmas stamp at all, only a "holiday cookies" stamp. I don't think last year's grumbling had any effect on their decision, as these things are picked well ahead of time; the 2007 lineup--which includes a Madonna and Child--is already selected and viewable on the USPS website. But Christians and tradition-minded people generally can show support of traditional Christmas imagery by requesting the Madonna and Child stamp over the Snowflake or other stamps for your mail this season.

A Small Update

Just as an update to my post of a few days ago, here's a link to a Wikipedia article on the metric system in the USA.

I note it says that construction has been the industry slowest to adopt metric units. I guess that explains why, when I wanted metric measurements on something I was looking at in Home Depot, I could not find a single measuring device with metric units on it.

Anyway, it sounds as if we're going to see more all-metric product labels in the near future, so I guess that's some progress.

In Which We Dip Our Toes Into the Depths of Auntie Suzanne's Psyche and Draw Back Quickly

The other night I dreamed I found or was given a piece of paper that had a design of letters with spaces written on it and if you folded the paper at the several spaces--kind of like the old MAD magazine puzzles--it would spell a word. It spelled meshuggeneh. When I woke up and remembered this, I had some vague idea that meshuggeneh meant crazy, but I hadn't heard the word in over twenty years and hadn known for sure what it meant then. So I looked it up. And discovered that it means specfically crazy woman. From this, I conclude that my subconscious knows Yiddish and uses it to insult me.

And that was even before I got to the part of that night's dreams where I decided to get into the room-sized hot tub--actually more of a warm tub--and "they" turned off the bubbles, so I decided to crawl over the threshold into the gymnasium-sized pool and they turned out the lights, to indicate they were closing. Ai yi yi, what a mind.

It's like the mule Faulkner talked about, who would faithfully serve a man for ten years, just for the sake of kicking him once. Except without the ten years of faithful service, especially nowadays; on that front it's more like a dog I knew who went for walkies with a great deal of enthusiasm, but if she got a little tired would flop down wherever she was for resties. Nowadays my mind is all kickies and resties and shoddy service, but I guess it can get away with it, being the only game in town (body?)

And I Think the British Have Some Sort of Celebration Today

Obviously, I'm talking about Guy Fawkes Day, or Bonfire Night. You can read more about it here or read more about the event it commorates in Antonia Fraser's Faith and Treason: The Story of the Gunpowder Plot; I recommend that book because it's interesting reading and is, moreover, the only book I've read on the subject. [insert eyeroll at my lack of history study here]

Or here's an even briefer introduction to the subject, in the form of a joke from an old BBC radio program:


" I've often wondered, who exactly was Guy Fawkes? Was he a Prime Minister?"
"No, no. Mind you, he should have been. He had more good ideas about Parliament than anybody else."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, he tried to blow it up."


In these days of rampant terrorism, I should hasten to add that I am NOT in favor of blowing up Parliament. But I appreciate the joke as speaking to that "hang 'em all as a warning to others" frustration that I think all of us have sometimes felt when looking at our politicians.

St. Elizabeth's Day

Today is the day we remember St. Elizabeth, whose story we read in the first chapter of Luke's Gospel. (RSV vailable online here or KJV here.) It's a good day to reread, if not the whole chapter, at least the beautiful story of the Visitation, which for Catholics is the second of the Joyful Mysteries to be meditated on in the rosary.

Here it is:


In those days Mary arose and went with haste into the hill country, to a city of Judah, and she entered the house of Zechari'ah and greeted Elizabeth. And when Elizabeth heard the greeting of Mary, the babe leaped in her womb; and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit and she exclaimed with a loud cry, "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb! And why is this granted me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For behold, when the voice of your greeting came to my ears, the babe in my womb leaped for joy. And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfilment of what was spoken to her from the Lord."

And Mary said, "My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has regarded the low estate of his handmaiden. For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. And his mercy is on those who fear him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm, he has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts, he has put down the mighty from their thrones, and exalted those of low degree; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent empty away. He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his posterity for ever."

(Luke, 1:39-55)

Why, Oh Why, Can't My Life Be A Smidgen More Convenient?

I know as a conservative, a neo-Luddite (so UP says), and a Southern girl, I'm supposed to be in favor of the quaintly old-fashioned, nostalgia, and traditional things in general, and for the most part I am. But it is increasingly irritating me to have to convert metric measurements to the imperial measuring system. Why doesn't the US just switch? When I was a little girl in the seventies, "they" said we were going to switch. I saw things about the coming change on TV. In later elementary school we were required to do a section on metric measurements and do rows of tedious conversions from imperial to metric, because we'd be going to metric soon. As far as I can tell, the only thing that ever got done about it was that they started to make soft drinks in 2-liter bottles. And apparently this exhausted "them", because those early '80s textbook questions were the last I ever heard about it.

Oh, we were expected to know a little along those lines for some high school science classes and Coca-cola eventually released a 1-liter bottle. And of course people of various professions have to get comfortable with some metric measurements, which some of them no doubt had to do even before the government said we were going to switch. But the average American has no intuitive understanding of what most metric measurements stand for, the way we intuitively understand about what amount a cup of flour, a gallon of milk, or a footlong sandwich is. You have to have frequent contact with a measuring system to get that intuitive idea of how much a particular unit is. If you don't have those daily life type connections, the measuring system will always seem foreign to you.

Why don't we switch? Our not switching creates problems even in simple online situations, with US people not understanding non-US people's recipes--and sewing, craft, or DIY instructions--and vice versa. This is aside from any international business or government & military interaction problems that might be caused and which are probably more important than my petty dithering over dowel sizes and fabric bolts but which, OTOH, most of us, don't have to deal with as often as we might a foreign recipe.

It's not as if the American people are too stupid to switch. We've gotten used to the only metrically-measured thing most of us commonly see, the 2-liter bottle. We have no problem talking about mega this and giga that and health nuts or people with medical conditions necessitating reading food labels don't crumple when some of the nutritional information is given in grams. Our cultural heritage is predominantly British, and the British adapted to using the metric system just fine. (Although I have heard a few English grumblings about decimilizing their money when watching old TV shows.) Everybody else does it, why can't we? And it's not even as if it's a newfangled thing. Surely even conservatives can embrace something that's been around since the late 1700s.

I realize I could just start using it myself, but to be honest I'm lazy. I don't remember all of the formulas I "learned" as a kid, and I'm not going to go out of my way to use metric when everything around me is set up in standard US measurement. (Thanks to sewing, I have learned approx cm to inch and roughly how a meter relates to a yard, but I kind of had to and it's not so ingrained I couldn't forget.) And even if I did my own personal switchover and I wanted to, say, give a coworker a recipe, I would have to translate "my" measurements for other people. Better we should all be on the same page.

All Hallows--We Are Not Alone

All Hallow's, the day that All Hallow's Eve is the eve of, is a day set aside to honor all saints (hence the modern name of All Saints Day), but perhaps more important, it is a day that reminds us we are not alone. Catholic teaching says that people alive on Earth, trying as best we can to live holy lives, are not alone in our efforts to come closer to God, but are surrounded by "clouds of witnesses"--people alive in heaven who wish us to succeed. They are all the people who have gone before us and made it to where we want to be. They are "a great multitude,which no one could count,from every nation, race, people, and tongue". The Church teaches that they will pray for us to God, if we ask them; of course you never need ask them if you don't want, but can it really hurt to have someone else also praying for you? Some of us--that would include me--need all the help we can get. When we are struggling and think we are struggling alone, we can not only ask God for help, but also ask a saint to ask for help for us too; I guess it's sort of like being in a big family and getting your brothers and sisters to join you in your requests to your father, although in this case the siblings are on Dad's side and probably aren't going to help you get ice cream for breakfast [lol].

Random Thoughts

It never fails to amaze me how many very proudly progressive types think nothing of badmouthing blue collar workers--the skilled laborers right along with unskilled. After all, we all "know" that plumbers are stupid, mechanics are men who couldn't get "real" jobs, etc.

***

On a Harry Potter site, I saw a reference to a non-book character Rowling created, "Honest" Willy Wagstaff, purveyor of questionable wands. Really, can you imagine a character who it'd be more fun to costume as at a convention? "Psst, wanna buy a wand?" [open robe to real rows of them]

***

Considering St. Jude is the patron saint of lost causes, St. Jude's Day (that's today) may be a good day to pray for Americans and British people to start acting less rude and crude in public. Or, better yet, to pray that more children are born into homes where mommy and daddy considered each other worth marrying.

***

If it's considered arrogant for Americans to tell people in other countries how they should run their governments, why isn't it considered arrogant for us to tell them they should use contraception?

***

When you walk by a girl in Best Buy, notice her hair, and think "boucle yarn", you may have spent too much time on Craftster.

***

In fall in south Mississippi, when people say "beautiful weather we're having" they mean just one thing: "Thank God it's not so hideously hot today!"

***

The capacity of humans to not learn from our mistakes is truly amazing. By which, of course, I mean my capacity to not learn from my past mistakes is truly amazing.

Still, I prefer living with my own incompetence to having the government step in and run things for me.

***

Even dogs--though a nigh-on infinitely superior animal--have trouble rivaling the safe, cosy feeling that can be brought on by the sight of a peacefully sleeping cat. Which is not exactly the feeling the sight of these cats arouses.

***

I saw something that said Protect Mother Nature. Would this be the same Mother Nature who dumps tsunamis, hurricaines, and earthquakes on us? The same one who buried Pompeii? I'm pretty sure that bitch can take care of herself.

Something to Amuse the Over Thirty-five Crowd

Recently a young co-worker of Uncle Pookie's, who's not long out of school, confidently told UP that he would still think about things the same way and have the same opinions the rest of his life. This amused UP enough to share with me, and I out and out laughed. (If you're under twenty-two or so and don't understand why this is funny, wait ten or fifteen years.) It may sound mean to laugh at youth's naivete, but I like to think of it as one of the consolation prizes we get in return for all of the things middle age takes away from us--things such as good eyesight, the ability to remember what we were just talking about, and the ability to go to work or school fresh as a daisy on under three hours of sleep.


For the record, when I was this fellow's age, I was an Utne reading, pro-choice, NOW-supporting, straight-ticket Democrat voter, who "knew" that all Republicans were racists; that all Christians were ignorant, gullible, and frightened of the big, wonderful universe we live in; that social conservatives were either tyrannical, sexist, reactionary men or their female dupes; that men just want to oppress women and women are somehow nobler than men; that anyone who didn't share my sexual mores was obviously repressed and joyless; and so forth. I don't think I was ever silly enough to say I would always hold the same opinions, but I wouldn't bet money I didn't think it--after all, why would I ever want to change, when my vast intelligence and two decades of experience had made me so obviously right about everything?

Something I've Wondered--Pro-life Grammar?

This is a very small thing and I am not trying to make fun of anyone by mentioning this, but I listen to EWTN radio or audiotaped TV pretty often and I sometimes hear something that I find grammatically odd. A fair number of people now use "pro-life" as a noun. They will say that someone "is working for pro-life", instead of saying that "So-and-so is doing pro-life work" or "So-and-so is a pro-life activist". Or they'll say things like "I try to talk to people about pro-life" or "She's involved in pro-life." Why not "I try to talk to people about pro-life philosophy/thought/concerns" or "She's involved in pro-life work." I don't understand why people would word things this way; it just does not sound like common usage. And how widespread is this? I accept Catholic teaching on life issues, but I am not involved in the pro-life political movement, so I don't know if this is something common to the movement as a whole or just something certain EWTN listeners/viewers use. It's not something that is keeping me up nights, but if anyone has an idea of what's going on here, I wouldn't mind hearing about it.