Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Cats Are Like Clerihews and Other Random Thoughts

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Someone once said that the odd thing about clerihews is that the very best of them aren't much distant from the worst of them. Cats are like that.

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How old do you have to be before you stop being a "product of conception"? I mean, I'm no longer an embryo, anymore than I'm a teenager, but aren't I still a product of conception?

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Do you think Scandinavians in the 870s ever crooned along to that great old song, "Who's Making Love to Your Old Lady, While You're Out Pillaging Saxons?"

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Pointless products: half-slips for mini-skirts. Really mini skirts. I think if you're wearing a skirt that barely covers your butt you've already decided you don't care if strangers can see what we euphemistically, and in this case ironically, refer to as your "privates".

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I really wish people would once again start using the word bitch to refer to female dogs. I have no quarrel with the other uses of the word, I just miss the original use.

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A relatively new (about 2 yo) pet peeve in my list of peeves: young girls referring to clothes that sit at the natural waist as "high-waisted". How can something possibly be high-waisted when it sits at the waist?

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If you kept trying to "express yourself" and everything you made was ugly, wouldn't you think it's time to try expressing something else?

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Spotted at a Best Buy: A longish job posting taped to the door that moves to the side as you approach. Apparently they're recruiting non-myopic speed readers.

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I recently heard that it's wrong to "put limits on people". Guess I'll get started protesting those anti-murder and anti-cannabalism laws now. I feel really limited by those animal cruelty laws too. And don't even get me started on that oppressive stuff about leaving vengeance to the Lord.

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